The OUTreach
OUTreach is the primary LGBTQIPA+ club at College University, a school in an unspecified midwestern state. College University is one of those quirky non-existant schools that would probably crash and burn in about a year in real life. CU is notable for not caring about criminal records as well as accepting anyone to the university if they go to visit the president in person and cry in front of him (sometimes he will also allow this via phone). CU has a reputation as a wierd university that nobody’s ever heard of.
So with that in mind… welcome to College University!
So with that in mind… welcome to College University!
The OUTReach, as previously mentioned, is the school’s primary LGBTQIPA+ club. The organization’s motto is “You don’t have to be OUT to be in OUTReach!”. It was founded about a few decades ago and was approved as an official student org after mass protest, mainly by non-student community members. Ever since, nothing much exciting has happened in the organization’s history. The organization is actually pretty popular, and is open to not only students but community members.
The E-Board Consists of the President, Vice President, Treasurer, Secretary, Public Relations Chair, Technology Chair and Historian. I’ll introduce them in a bit. Everyone thinks that there are too many people on the E-Board, but its in the original constitution and nobody wants to anger the original alumni founders.
As with all student organizations on the College University campus, The OUTReach has two advisors, one who is a faculty member and one who is a community member. The faculty member advisor is Dr. Taine Koremos, professor of Geological Engineering, and the community member is Chandni Tambe.
The E-Board Consists of the President, Vice President, Treasurer, Secretary, Public Relations Chair, Technology Chair and Historian. I’ll introduce them in a bit. Everyone thinks that there are too many people on the E-Board, but its in the original constitution and nobody wants to anger the original alumni founders.
As with all student organizations on the College University campus, The OUTReach has two advisors, one who is a faculty member and one who is a community member. The faculty member advisor is Dr. Taine Koremos, professor of Geological Engineering, and the community member is Chandni Tambe.
Features of the College University Campus: The Monuments
In front of the library are 8 large stone panels, arranged on either side of a walkway, lined up. They practically bisect the entire south half of north campus, it's nearly impossible to get from the east half of north campus to the west or vise versa without having to walk around or between the monuments. Each monument is roughly 20 feet high, a foot wide, and 50 feet long. The stone to create them was a donation by alumni, who kind of showed up at campus with all this stone for the 150th University Celebration.
A local artist was comissioned to decorate the stones with the aid of art students, and after five years, the decoration was complete. The panels closest to the library depict (L) The founding of College University, in 1816 and (R) The First Commencement, including the "Walking of the Goats", a CU tradition until its ban in 1972. The panels beyond that depict (L) The construction of the first library in 1827 and (R) the great library fire of 1920 and the building of the current library. The panels beyond /that/ depict the (L) College University Campus of the 1950s, and (R) the late 1960's (current at the time) College University campus, and the final set of stones depict (L) the future College University campus, with vaguely futuristic flourishes, a giant eye in place of the sun, and a more diverse student body and (R) the elder gods descending onto the College University campus, enlightening the student body as they shed their flesh and rise to the next plane of existence.
The monuments were kept a great secret until their unveiling in 1971, and despite being right next to the library, elaborate systems of tarps and the like were set up so that they would not be seen until the 155th University Celebration. Former CU president Dr. Marin stood in front of the library, University Trumpet in hand as all the tarps were pulled back as one, a job that would have been done by the original artist had they not called in sick. All of the panels were well-recieved by the alumni besides the last pair, and the donor who had originally donated the stone for the project called for the destruction of the monuments. The campus police tried to stop allumni from attacking the final monument, but failed at first, though in the end they finally managed to calm and arrest the crowd. The final monument did sustain some damage that has lasted until this very day.
Current CU President, Dr. Malone Kairos, loves the monuments and references them in almost every speech he makes. As former Alumni Coordinator he spurred a group of alumni who went to school with the monuments in place to donate enough to install benches and commemorative pavers near the monuments, and his current campaign as president is to find the original artist of the monuments and have them repair the final monument, restoring it to its true glory.
A local artist was comissioned to decorate the stones with the aid of art students, and after five years, the decoration was complete. The panels closest to the library depict (L) The founding of College University, in 1816 and (R) The First Commencement, including the "Walking of the Goats", a CU tradition until its ban in 1972. The panels beyond that depict (L) The construction of the first library in 1827 and (R) the great library fire of 1920 and the building of the current library. The panels beyond /that/ depict the (L) College University Campus of the 1950s, and (R) the late 1960's (current at the time) College University campus, and the final set of stones depict (L) the future College University campus, with vaguely futuristic flourishes, a giant eye in place of the sun, and a more diverse student body and (R) the elder gods descending onto the College University campus, enlightening the student body as they shed their flesh and rise to the next plane of existence.
The monuments were kept a great secret until their unveiling in 1971, and despite being right next to the library, elaborate systems of tarps and the like were set up so that they would not be seen until the 155th University Celebration. Former CU president Dr. Marin stood in front of the library, University Trumpet in hand as all the tarps were pulled back as one, a job that would have been done by the original artist had they not called in sick. All of the panels were well-recieved by the alumni besides the last pair, and the donor who had originally donated the stone for the project called for the destruction of the monuments. The campus police tried to stop allumni from attacking the final monument, but failed at first, though in the end they finally managed to calm and arrest the crowd. The final monument did sustain some damage that has lasted until this very day.
Current CU President, Dr. Malone Kairos, loves the monuments and references them in almost every speech he makes. As former Alumni Coordinator he spurred a group of alumni who went to school with the monuments in place to donate enough to install benches and commemorative pavers near the monuments, and his current campaign as president is to find the original artist of the monuments and have them repair the final monument, restoring it to its true glory.
Features of the College University Campus: The Dr. Marin Memorial Library
After the Great Library Fire in 1920, former CU president Dr. Lumbfort famously proclaimed, "There will be no new library- all the surviving books shall be placed in class rooms, dormitory rooms, and everywhere on campus, so all may enjoy them!" For the next eleven years, that plan was put into action. The surviving books of the library were placed in specific shelves in academic buildings, dormitory buildings, and administrative buildings, and there was a master catalog listing where every book was. However, in 1931, after Dr. Lumbfort was mysteriously killed by being pushed off the roof of the Administration Building, the new CU President, Dr. Narling, began to create plans for a new library building. Dr. Narling's obsession over the new library would consume him until his death in 1945.
The Marin Memorial Library, then called simply "The Library" was originally to be a regular library, kind of square shaped and around 5 stories high. However, after a trip to a library with a pneumatic book system, Dr. Narling became obsessed with the idea of a fully pneumatic library, every book available at the touch of a button. Spending his life's savings and more allumni donations than were allotted for the library project, a new, 20 story high library was constructed. The library had a cylindrical shape, and contained several odd features, like the 5 story high atrium with the reading room (now the library cafe) on a large concrete pillar, so that one could see all the books "in their full majesty". Several stories worth of book vending machines were also to be purchased, a statue of Dr. Narling crushing Dr. Lumbfort underfoot was commissioned for the library, and all bathrooms were to be unisex and contain separate rooms with baths. Tragically, there was not enough money to complete the full vision of the library. After years of construction, it was not to be.
Books began to be moved into the library in 1943, though protests from students who enjoyed having books in their dorm rooms delayed their full transfer until 1944. Dr. Narling, still grieving his original vision for the library, entombed himself in the "University President's Room" of the library during a rather slow weekend on campus, and attempts to remove his bones were met with great hostility by the student body.
After Dr. Narling's death, police raiding his home discovered evidence that he was responsible for Dr. Lumbfort's murder, and the giant statue of Dr. Narling crushing him underfoot, always thought to be in pretty poor taste, was removed. The statue was melted down and recast into the popular "Two Dogs Fighting" statue, until the fact that it was formerly the Narling vs Lumbfort statue was discovered and once again it was thought to be in pretty poor taste. Two Dogs Fighting was kept in University Storage for several decades, until it was recently recast into its original form and placed back in the library.
The library was renamed in 1990 after Dr. Marin's death, and a statue of him, holding a giant book and the University Trumpet sits outside of the President's Room in a place of honor. This was also when the Reading Room was turned into the Library Cafe, which serves Starbucks products as well as CU favorites, such as Fried Fries, Grilled Ham and Cheese Bites, and, of course, the CU Bar. There's also a real Starbucks in the food court in sub-basement 4.
Today's library continues to be probably the least accessible building on campus (the elevators have not been updated since 1943, and it is very hard to cross the atrium bridges to the Library Cafe, also it's like 20 stories tall) and it also has probably the worst wifi, except in the cafe and a few of the computer labs. Most of the book vending machines were removed in the early 1990s and placed in the university museum, and the floors they took up are computer labs. There is a special room in the library called the Narling room, dedicated to his idea of books at the touch of a button- it contains tablets which have much of the library's digital collection on them, and the tablets are available for students to check out.
The Marin Memorial Library, then called simply "The Library" was originally to be a regular library, kind of square shaped and around 5 stories high. However, after a trip to a library with a pneumatic book system, Dr. Narling became obsessed with the idea of a fully pneumatic library, every book available at the touch of a button. Spending his life's savings and more allumni donations than were allotted for the library project, a new, 20 story high library was constructed. The library had a cylindrical shape, and contained several odd features, like the 5 story high atrium with the reading room (now the library cafe) on a large concrete pillar, so that one could see all the books "in their full majesty". Several stories worth of book vending machines were also to be purchased, a statue of Dr. Narling crushing Dr. Lumbfort underfoot was commissioned for the library, and all bathrooms were to be unisex and contain separate rooms with baths. Tragically, there was not enough money to complete the full vision of the library. After years of construction, it was not to be.
Books began to be moved into the library in 1943, though protests from students who enjoyed having books in their dorm rooms delayed their full transfer until 1944. Dr. Narling, still grieving his original vision for the library, entombed himself in the "University President's Room" of the library during a rather slow weekend on campus, and attempts to remove his bones were met with great hostility by the student body.
After Dr. Narling's death, police raiding his home discovered evidence that he was responsible for Dr. Lumbfort's murder, and the giant statue of Dr. Narling crushing him underfoot, always thought to be in pretty poor taste, was removed. The statue was melted down and recast into the popular "Two Dogs Fighting" statue, until the fact that it was formerly the Narling vs Lumbfort statue was discovered and once again it was thought to be in pretty poor taste. Two Dogs Fighting was kept in University Storage for several decades, until it was recently recast into its original form and placed back in the library.
The library was renamed in 1990 after Dr. Marin's death, and a statue of him, holding a giant book and the University Trumpet sits outside of the President's Room in a place of honor. This was also when the Reading Room was turned into the Library Cafe, which serves Starbucks products as well as CU favorites, such as Fried Fries, Grilled Ham and Cheese Bites, and, of course, the CU Bar. There's also a real Starbucks in the food court in sub-basement 4.
Today's library continues to be probably the least accessible building on campus (the elevators have not been updated since 1943, and it is very hard to cross the atrium bridges to the Library Cafe, also it's like 20 stories tall) and it also has probably the worst wifi, except in the cafe and a few of the computer labs. Most of the book vending machines were removed in the early 1990s and placed in the university museum, and the floors they took up are computer labs. There is a special room in the library called the Narling room, dedicated to his idea of books at the touch of a button- it contains tablets which have much of the library's digital collection on them, and the tablets are available for students to check out.
Features of the College University Campus: The Great Bridge
North Campus and South Campus are separated by a small neighborhood of townhouses, already in place when the land for South Campus was bought. After years of students simply walking through the neighborhood, non CU-affiliated residents began to complain to the CU administration, who ordered the construction of The Great Bridge.
The Great Bridge is a large bridge, both very high and long, that connects North and South Campus. Stairs lead up to an enclosed moving walkway, with walking lanes in the center. A pretty long bridge, The Great Bridge has no wheelchair ramps or elevators and is completely inaccessible. If Anya ever actually starts her disability club (or someone else does) their first act will be getting an elevator for The Great Bridge.
The Great Bridge was closed after 10 PM for many years, and staying overnight on the bridge or breaking onto it after 10 was a common hazing practice, but due to the night classes now offered at CU, it is now open 24/7. Also, all greek life organizations have been banned since 2003. Drinking on the Great Bridge is strictly forbidden, and it is a senior tradition to walk across the bridge multiple times, each time taking a drink until one is extremely drunk. The Great Bridge is decorated for all CU holidays.
Great Bridge T-Shirts, mini bridges, mugs, and shot glasses can all be found in the CU campus stores.
The Great Bridge is a large bridge, both very high and long, that connects North and South Campus. Stairs lead up to an enclosed moving walkway, with walking lanes in the center. A pretty long bridge, The Great Bridge has no wheelchair ramps or elevators and is completely inaccessible. If Anya ever actually starts her disability club (or someone else does) their first act will be getting an elevator for The Great Bridge.
The Great Bridge was closed after 10 PM for many years, and staying overnight on the bridge or breaking onto it after 10 was a common hazing practice, but due to the night classes now offered at CU, it is now open 24/7. Also, all greek life organizations have been banned since 2003. Drinking on the Great Bridge is strictly forbidden, and it is a senior tradition to walk across the bridge multiple times, each time taking a drink until one is extremely drunk. The Great Bridge is decorated for all CU holidays.
Great Bridge T-Shirts, mini bridges, mugs, and shot glasses can all be found in the CU campus stores.
Features of the College University Campus: South Campus
College University grew and flourished in its first hundred years, and it was decided that the current land allotted would not be enough for its expansion. A second plot of land was bought to be South Campus, but it lay unused for several years as enrollment went down and the land was unneeded. However, as enrollment soared once more, construction finally began, and South Campus formed.
South Campus is home to some of the engineering buildings, The Maths Building, The Fish and Waterlife Research Center, the Student Development Complex, The Center for Computers and Computing, The University Museum, Lorin Hall, The Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center, The Eats, and two dorms. Many of the buildings here are the most attractive on campus, and most postcards of CU focus on South Campus. Several well-known statues and gardens are also on this campus, like Three Men Holding Oversized Books, The Pillar of Learning, Rebuilding The Tower of Babel, University Presidents Who Are Dead Hugging it Out, Pointless Modern Art Shapes, and The Obelisk Garden.
The two student dorms on South Campus are served by “The Eats”, a building which contains the gluten-free, vegan cafeteria on campus, a starbucks, The Cheesery, The Hall of Vending Machines, and The Vending Services Office. The Cheesery is home to the best grilled cheese, grilled ham and cheese, grilled soy-ham and cheese, and grilled cheese bites on campus. They also serve amazing smoothies and juices. The Hall of Vending Machines has rows and rows of vending machines, and is connected to the Office of Vending Services, the only place on campus you can get a refund if the vending machine eats your money.
Features of the College University Campus: The Obelisk Garden
Located between the Center for Computers and Computing and the Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center, the Obelisk Garden was built in 1965 by the same artist who would later create the University Monuments. A serene, peaceful garden with many benches and a small fake moat, the central focus of the garden is a 5 foot high obelisk engraved with words in many different languages. While at its unveiling it was claimed that the obelisk has the words for learning, peace, love, books, academia, fellowship, tenure, and education in several languages, it has turned out since that the obelisk actually contains an invocation to unknown entities, calling upon them to bless the CU campus with their presence. After the full translation of the obelisk was released in The U, College University’s official student paper and least trusted news source, it has become a student tradition to stand around the obelisk, chanting, after graduation. Chanting around the obelisk before graduation is supposed to curse the student to drop out of CU or fail all their classes and be expelled. The Obelisk Garden is a popular spot for poetry readings, dates, photo opportunities, and campus tours.
Features of the College University Campus: The Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center The Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center, known as the HWCSC (pronounced as How-Cees) is an attractive three story building next to the Obelisk Garden and the Student Development Complex. The first floor is University Health Services, containing the university health center, temporary rooms for sick and injured students, a bus station with a regular bus to College University Hospital, and an attractive mural of University Health Student Workers bashing plague demons in the head with those knee-hammer things. The second floor is home to Wellness, including Counseling Services, the LGBTQ Resource Center, and the general Wellness Offices. The third floor is Career Services, including the offices of Career Services Staff, the room of Resume Help, rooms for real or mock interviews, and the Jobs Database.
The LGBTQ+ Resource Center is a newer addition to campus. While such resources were originally kept in the Office of Diversity in the admin building on North Campus, alumni donations and the needs of the increasingly queer student body have required that the office Wellness used to use for the Sexual Health and Protection Center be given to the LGBTQ+ Resource Center, and the SHaP center be moved into the now-defunct Food Pyramid Enforcement Office. The LGBTQ+ Resource Center contains books, magazines, pamphlets, rooms and materials for Safe Space training, and a usually friendly student worker to help students out. The Historical Archives of OUTreach are also kept here. The SHaP center is across from the LGBTQ+RC, and students at the front desks of both centers can talk across the hall. Here, pamphlets and books about safer sex as well as supplies, including the infamous barrel of condoms can be found.
Counseling Services is on this floor, and all counselors have private offices. They are trained to do things such as not misgender students, actually take their issues seriously, and appointments are easy to schedule. Check-in is done through tablets, so you don’t even have to talk to a person at a desk, and there are enough counselors for everyone, including a psychiatrist.
South Campus is home to some of the engineering buildings, The Maths Building, The Fish and Waterlife Research Center, the Student Development Complex, The Center for Computers and Computing, The University Museum, Lorin Hall, The Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center, The Eats, and two dorms. Many of the buildings here are the most attractive on campus, and most postcards of CU focus on South Campus. Several well-known statues and gardens are also on this campus, like Three Men Holding Oversized Books, The Pillar of Learning, Rebuilding The Tower of Babel, University Presidents Who Are Dead Hugging it Out, Pointless Modern Art Shapes, and The Obelisk Garden.
The two student dorms on South Campus are served by “The Eats”, a building which contains the gluten-free, vegan cafeteria on campus, a starbucks, The Cheesery, The Hall of Vending Machines, and The Vending Services Office. The Cheesery is home to the best grilled cheese, grilled ham and cheese, grilled soy-ham and cheese, and grilled cheese bites on campus. They also serve amazing smoothies and juices. The Hall of Vending Machines has rows and rows of vending machines, and is connected to the Office of Vending Services, the only place on campus you can get a refund if the vending machine eats your money.
Features of the College University Campus: The Obelisk Garden
Located between the Center for Computers and Computing and the Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center, the Obelisk Garden was built in 1965 by the same artist who would later create the University Monuments. A serene, peaceful garden with many benches and a small fake moat, the central focus of the garden is a 5 foot high obelisk engraved with words in many different languages. While at its unveiling it was claimed that the obelisk has the words for learning, peace, love, books, academia, fellowship, tenure, and education in several languages, it has turned out since that the obelisk actually contains an invocation to unknown entities, calling upon them to bless the CU campus with their presence. After the full translation of the obelisk was released in The U, College University’s official student paper and least trusted news source, it has become a student tradition to stand around the obelisk, chanting, after graduation. Chanting around the obelisk before graduation is supposed to curse the student to drop out of CU or fail all their classes and be expelled. The Obelisk Garden is a popular spot for poetry readings, dates, photo opportunities, and campus tours.
Features of the College University Campus: The Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center The Health, Wellness, and Career Services Center, known as the HWCSC (pronounced as How-Cees) is an attractive three story building next to the Obelisk Garden and the Student Development Complex. The first floor is University Health Services, containing the university health center, temporary rooms for sick and injured students, a bus station with a regular bus to College University Hospital, and an attractive mural of University Health Student Workers bashing plague demons in the head with those knee-hammer things. The second floor is home to Wellness, including Counseling Services, the LGBTQ Resource Center, and the general Wellness Offices. The third floor is Career Services, including the offices of Career Services Staff, the room of Resume Help, rooms for real or mock interviews, and the Jobs Database.
The LGBTQ+ Resource Center is a newer addition to campus. While such resources were originally kept in the Office of Diversity in the admin building on North Campus, alumni donations and the needs of the increasingly queer student body have required that the office Wellness used to use for the Sexual Health and Protection Center be given to the LGBTQ+ Resource Center, and the SHaP center be moved into the now-defunct Food Pyramid Enforcement Office. The LGBTQ+ Resource Center contains books, magazines, pamphlets, rooms and materials for Safe Space training, and a usually friendly student worker to help students out. The Historical Archives of OUTreach are also kept here. The SHaP center is across from the LGBTQ+RC, and students at the front desks of both centers can talk across the hall. Here, pamphlets and books about safer sex as well as supplies, including the infamous barrel of condoms can be found.
Counseling Services is on this floor, and all counselors have private offices. They are trained to do things such as not misgender students, actually take their issues seriously, and appointments are easy to schedule. Check-in is done through tablets, so you don’t even have to talk to a person at a desk, and there are enough counselors for everyone, including a psychiatrist.
Features of College University: The Holidays
Due to the University Bylaws, the code of rules written by the Founder of College University (whose name is not to be said on campus grounds), “Each month shall have its own holiday, which shall not be the holidays celebrated by the world outside of this university. We shall have our own holidays, which shall be unique to us, and there shall be only one a month, save for the Presidents’ Birthday. While they may be changed, these rules shall not.” The current holidays are-
Due to the University Bylaws, the code of rules written by the Founder of College University (whose name is not to be said on campus grounds), “Each month shall have its own holiday, which shall not be the holidays celebrated by the world outside of this university. We shall have our own holidays, which shall be unique to us, and there shall be only one a month, save for the Presidents’ Birthday. While they may be changed, these rules shall not.” The current holidays are-
January- The Grilled Cheese Festival, a celebration of Grilled Cheese in all its forms, including the famous Grilled Cheese Bites, a unique CU food. Student Organizations will sell grilled cheese, the world’s greatest grilled cheese competition occurs, and the dining halls will serve grilled cheese for the entire week, except for the one in “The Eats”, which serves soy cheese on several forms of wrap. The Great Bridge is the hot spot for student orgs to sell the grilled cheese- there are three spots available, and they go fast. You have to sign up practically years in advance.
February- Greek Life Abolishment Day, a day celebrating former university president Dr. Lillis’s decision to ban all Greek Life from campus. The public shaming of any students caught attempting to form fraternities or sororities in secret is the highlight of the holiday, or at least it would be if anyone had been caught on campus in the last five years. Dr. Karios is considering bringing back former holiday “Love Day”, though possibly in a new form as “All Relationships and Lack Thereof Are Fine Day”.
February 20th- President’s Birthday. Dr. Karios’s birthday is on this day. As per the University Bylaws- “The Birthday of this University’s Noble President Shall be Celebrated with Cake and Iced Cream and Squid.” All dining halls serve those foods for the birthday, except for The Eats, which serves a giant vegan cake shaped like a squid and soy cheese on wrap sandwiches.
March 3rd- Monument Day. A holiday established by Dr. Kairos, all students get the day off and free food is given on the walkway between the monuments in front of the library. Monument shirts are half off, Dr. Kairos gives a speech, and poems about the monuments are read.
April 13th- University Founding Day. A holiday celebrating the university and its founding. A reenactment of the founding occurs, and all students have the afternoon off to watch. Few students actually watch the reenactment, though the faculty come out in numbers to view it. Dr. Kairos blows the same University Trumpet that was used by the University Founder, and it is pretty gross for him.
May 10th- Free Grilled Cheese Day. Yet another holiday celebrating grilled cheese. OUTreach is petitioning to make this “Pride Day”, because look, one grilled-cheese based holiday is enough.
June 9th- President’s Day. Different than the president’s birthday, this holiday celebrates all CU presidents, past, present, and future. Their Portraits are taken out of storage and paraded around the campus, and their favorite foods are served in the dining hall. It’s a pretty low-key holiday because everyone is on break.
July 21st- History Day. A day to celebrate CU’s traditions, history, and the like. The University Museum has the most visitors come this day, and it is also part of any alumni reunions that take place. Pictures of alumni are placed on the Great Bridge for all to see.
August- O Week. The orientation for the freshmen and transfer students. Various events take place to welcome them to campus, and freshmen learn about university traditions, history, and, of course, the holidays. There is also the big O-Week dance. A past tradition of O-Week dances is that men and women were not allowed to dance together, making gay students very happy, but this tradition has been abolished.
September 32nd- The Great Procession. At CU, the first two days of October are considered to be also the last two days of September, and are doubly numbered on all official calendars, as well as by many professors. Traditionally, all students, faculty, and staff line up for the Great Procession, starting at the administration building, going to the library, going between the monuments, across the great bridge, and ending up at the Pillar of Learning. However, many students cannot make the journey or are not willing to line up for the parade, though it is still popular with many students. Students who use wheelchairs have been displeased about the inclusion of the Great Bridge in the procession for decades, without any results.
October 31st- The Frightening Day. It is just halloween. Dr. Kairos really likes halloween and figures that if he gives it a different name nobody will complain. Nobody really does. Professors are given a small budget to give out candy to their students on this day, and the theatre department must rent out free costumes to anyone who requests them. There is the grand dance between the monuments on the night of the Frightening Day, including a costume contest, which Dr. Kairos wins every single year. Spooky Grilled Cheeses with mystery fillings, apple cider, caramel covered apples, and chocolate covered spiders are some of the foods given out on this day, and all buildings on campus are decorated, especially the library and Great Bridge.
November (Week before Thanksgiving)- Week You Get Off. This is a week students have off. It is the week before thanksgiving. Due to Dr. Kairos’s strong dislike for thanksgiving, CU students, faculty, and staff do not have Thanksgiving off. However, they do (also) have the day after Thanksgiving off, and the dining hall always has nice food on that day. That day is called Second Midterms Relief Day, and it is technically not a holiday.
December- winter. The entire month of December is home to a holiday merely known as winter, which culminates in winter break. winter is never capitalized, even at the beginning of sentences. There is the Snow Ball, the winter shrub decorating contest, Snowman Fights, and Hot Cocoa Exam Relief. Religious student organizations and clubs also have celebrations, which are highly publicized in the book of winter, a brochure each student is given after they return from Week You Get Off. Student Orgs compete to be able to dress up the stairways of the Great Bridge in whatever way they want.
Features of the College University Campus: The Maths Building
A modern, 5 story high building, the first thing one sees as they enter the maths building is the large mural. Due to a tragic mixup, the mural depicting "The Greats of Math" and Math History was installed in a local middle school, and the Maths Building instead has a large mural depicting teenagers skating on math-themed skateboards, doing tricks, and saying things like "Math is totally radical!" and "Stay in School!"
The Maths building has the offices of various professors in the department of Mathematics, several large lecture halls, regular-sized classrooms, cafe, the math learning center, computer labs, and the math library.
The cafe, originally named the Aftermath Cafe, had its name changed to the Totally Radical Cafe after several snide reviews of the cafe in The U. The logo depicts a radical in place of the word radical, causing some students to mistakenly call it the "Totally Root Cafe". The Totally Radical Cafe sells coffee, milkshakes, smoothies, mini pies (you can get six for 3.14 or a dozen for 6.28), Escher cookies, and 3d printed chocolate. The punch cards require completion of a math riddle to turn in, and the cafe generally brings leftovers to the Math Learning Center for the coaches.
The Math faculty usually decorate the building pretty nicely for the major campus holidays, as well as for Pi Day, Tau Day, e Day, and Fibonacci day.
The Maths building has the offices of various professors in the department of Mathematics, several large lecture halls, regular-sized classrooms, cafe, the math learning center, computer labs, and the math library.
The cafe, originally named the Aftermath Cafe, had its name changed to the Totally Radical Cafe after several snide reviews of the cafe in The U. The logo depicts a radical in place of the word radical, causing some students to mistakenly call it the "Totally Root Cafe". The Totally Radical Cafe sells coffee, milkshakes, smoothies, mini pies (you can get six for 3.14 or a dozen for 6.28), Escher cookies, and 3d printed chocolate. The punch cards require completion of a math riddle to turn in, and the cafe generally brings leftovers to the Math Learning Center for the coaches.
The Math faculty usually decorate the building pretty nicely for the major campus holidays, as well as for Pi Day, Tau Day, e Day, and Fibonacci day.
Features of the College University Campus: The Pillar of Learning
The original pillar of learning was built shortly after the university's founding, and was on North Campus. A simple, attractive pillar, it had various quotes from the university's founder on it. This pillar was stolen by a disgruntled professor in the early 1890s. The second pillar of learning was very similar to the first, but pictured books on it and was made of wood, making it a target for the book-hating arsonist responsible for the Great Library Fire of 1920. After the second pillar was burned with many of the books on campus during the horrible night of the Great Library Fire, a new pillar was constructed. This one would be made of metal once more, and was to be placed on South Campus. As it was completed before any of the buildings on South Campus, it sat there for many years, unused. The third pillar went back to having quotes from the University Founder on it, as well as quotes by several CU presidents, professors, and alumni. However, at only 4 feet tall, it was the smallest pillar, and in 1960 it was targeted by students from a rival school and stolen as a prank. However, the students completely forgot they had it and did not return it. In 1962, realizing they would not get the Pillar of Learning back, a new Pillar of Learning was commissioned. The first commissioning of the local artist who would later go on to create the Obelisk Garden and Monuments, this became the largest and most elaborate pillar of learning yet. It depicted a large pillar with quotes from the third pillar, but with a giant book with an oversized eye on it atop the pillar, and students kneeling at the base of the pillar, pleading to and worshipping the eye book. It is too large for anyone to steal, as well as stuck into the ground with a firm concrete base and several metal rods.
The Pillar of Learning is highly used in the university procession, and it's said that if you can touch the eye on the eye book, the eye will give you all As on your finals.
The Pillar of Learning is highly used in the university procession, and it's said that if you can touch the eye on the eye book, the eye will give you all As on your finals.
Author's Note: This is the first time all these things have been collected in one place. I'm glad that I wrote all of this about College University on one hand, but on the other hand, I feel like we now know more about that place than the University of Kirov, which we've spent the entire campaign at.
Word Count: 4262 words. It is counted as a snooplet due to its density.
Date: July 9th-10th, 2015
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